Single parents do have special issues when they are looking for relationships. Developing a romance or having on overnight guest can sometimes be awkward with children at home. And practical obstacles, such as baby sitters’ schedules, can make it difficult to exercise the freedom a single parent would otherwise have.
But, often, there are ways to handle these so that you can have the life you want and still be a loving and responsible parent.
When you have children to care for, many questions arise which childless singles do not have to consider.
1) Are you concerned about making the most of visitation time with your kids?
2) Do you think potential partners are scared off because you’re a parent?
3) Do you worry how to answer a child’s questions about your romantic life?
4) Do you wonder when you should introduce your child to someone you’re dating?
5) Are you concerned about the legal implications of getting involved with somebody?
Here are some solutions to the common questions single parents are concerned with.
Potential partners are driven away by single parenthood
If you have a kid and you are dating someone who dislikes or has little interest in children, then you are probably better off thinking of this relationship as temporary rather than work it out to be potentially lasting commitment. By expecting that the person will change, you may be setting yourself up for disappointing in the long run.
As a relationshiop develops, it eventually becomes important to introduce your significant other to your kids. If, over time, there’s a clash between them, your relationship might not be feasible, no matter how romantic you both feel when the two of you are alone.
Making the most of kids’ visitation time
If you have to balance visitation time with your social life, the principle is to make your activities and the general climate as normal for all of you as possible. That way, your kid will also have much less difficulty adjusting when he or she goes home to the custodial parent. Always remember that you have divorced your spouse, but not your kids.
Introducing the significant other to the children
When you are beginning to get more involved, it’s time to let the other person meet the kids. Make some observations. How does your friend interact with your kids? Does your friend make an effort to get to know your children? Does he or she seem jealous of or threatened by them? Is he or she competing with the kids for your attention?
If your partner resents their presence, this is unlikely to change, leaving your torn as the relationship progresses. Your kids are here to stay, but your partner may not be. Any adult who puts a parent in the position of having to choose is exhibiting immature behavior.
Facing questions about your romantic life
Children ask questions about a single parent’s partners at different ages. Tell them the truth. If you are seriously involved with someone, it’s okay to let them know. ON the other hand, there’s no reason why they need to know the details of your relationship that don’t concern them.
Kids of single parents simply want assurance that everything that affects them will be all right. They may fear being told, suddenly, that their life is going to change without their needs being considered. They will usually ask what they need to know.
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